South Florida in the middle of November. Meh. On the bright side, shootings dip when the weather gets cooler.
Category: THE 2019 SEASON
Preseason Record 1-0 Regular Record 0-0
WEEK 12: BILLS VS BRONCOS
Elite QB Joe Flacco brings his Denv… okay. I will stop.
WEEK 13: BILLS @ COWBOYS
The last time the Bills played on Thanksgiving, I ate turkey. I have on other Thanksgivings too but just sayin’. Oh yeah, stay home for this one and watch with loved ones and annoying people called “family.”
WEEK 14: BILLS VS. RAVENS
Elite QB Joe Flacco…okay. I said I’d stop but I just can’t. Lamar Jackson is no Joe Flacco.
WEEK 15: BILLS @ STEELERS
Finally met a person from Pittsburgh that I liked but not enough to not use her Terrible Towel to wipe my butt.
WEEK 16: BILLS @ PATRIOTS
Mispronouncing names is fun. I like to call The BILLIE’s wife Gihzalay Bookohdamn. If he is a goat then she must just be a Nanny.
WEEK 17: BILLS VS. JETS
Hmm. Let’s look at the Bills Wildcard scenarios…beat the Jets, the Browns need to lose or tie, Canadians need to stop saying “eh,” and the Montreal Alouettes must admit Marv Levy was only coach of the Bills.
WK 1: BILLS 17 JETS 16 (WIN 1-0)
The Gore-Beasley Era begins in the Meadowlands!
WK 2: BILLS 28 GIANTS 14 (W 2-0)
Why not just stay in the Meadowlands? Hoffa did.
WK 4: BILLS 10 PATRIOTS 16 (L 3-1)
Will the Pats have lost 2 of their 3 first games as they always do? Will Gronk be back? Who’s bringing the sex toy?
WK 5: BILLS 14 TITANS 7 (W 4-1)
Tennessee is as hard to spell as Mississippi. Thanks to the gods we only need to go to Nashville.
WEEK 6: BILLS VS NOBODY
Stay home or steal a neighbor’s chickens. It’s the Bye Week!
WK 7: BILLS 31 DOLPHINS 21 (5-1)
Time for a meeting with the Fins. It sucks not playing them in the snow….but it is October in Buffalo.
WK 8: BILLS 13 EAGLES 31 (5-2)
Ow. That hurt.
WK 9: BILLS 24 SKINS 9 (W 6-2)
Yay! It’s the Culturally Insensitive game. Why don’t they just switch their logo to a Potato? Wait for it…ahh. You get it.
WEEK 10: BILLS @ BROWNS
Cleveland is the new Buffalo! Or is Buffalo the new Cleveland? Either way, neither is St. Louis and that is a good thing.
